What Is The Higher Self?

 

What Is The Higher Self?

 

Are we just a body with a personality? From my understanding, we are much more than that. Each one of us has a higher aspect. This higher aspect has been typically called the Higher Self. Others have also referred to it as the Oversoul or Overself.

 

Who and what is the Higher Self? The Higher Self is the intelligence and wisdom aspect of our own self. Ironically, the Higher Self is impersonal and does not have a ‘sense of self’ like the way our personality is. Nevertheless, it serves as a guiding aspect for the personality or ego.

 

Can this elusive higher self be contacted?

 Yes, and typically it is done through meditation or some other altered states of consciousness.

I first encountered my Higher Self through a guided meditation at a retreat.

She looks much like me, only healthier. She has a white aura around her, usually. Sometimes it is indigo or violet.

She's been where I have been. She knows where I am going. She is wise.

I can ask her questions and she will give me guidance.

She shows up in my Reiki sessions. 

If you would like help reaching out to your higher self, schedule a session with me.

https://calendly.com/jessicalloyd/energy-healing-session-and-payment

Healers need Healers

Grief hit last night.

I had my daughter and her two kids over for most of the day. Even though there were fun parts, it was stressful and my blood sugar showed that.

After she left, I was exhausted.

My husband made dinner. It was a little higher carb than I really wanted, but I was grateful that I didn't have to make it.

While he was prepping for today's Dungeons and Dragons adventure, I watched a little YouTube, and drew on my tablet.

And I ate. 

And I ate.

And I ate.

UGH!

I know I'm an emotional eater.

I know I have tools to deal with being emotional.

But...

I didn't use them.

(head slap)

If I was a drinker, I probably would've drank too much. But alcohol makes my body flush all over and my it is really uncomfortable. So I'm not a drinker.

After I realized I was emotionally eating (recognition is the first step to fixing anything), I sat with my feelings. 

Sadness.

Grief.

Feeling alone.

Loss of future carbs (dessert, bread, rice, pasta, tortillas...).

FOMO

We go to a lot of social functions where we eat and even though I know there are other diabetics there, I see them eating stuff that I know will spike my blood sugar. I've been there before, when I've had Crohn's flares. I know what this is going to feel like watching others eat food that I can't have.

I know I can have these foods, that I can take more insulin to counter it, but that doesn't feel healthy.

So, I sat in those ugly feelings.

Why?

Because I know if I don't feel the feelings they will find a place to live in my body and wreak more chaos. I'm sure there are emotions that I didn't deal with that are behind the pancreatitis and diabetes. I haven't done the work to clear that yet. 

I didn't know I needed too. 

Because I didn't look there. 

I haven't done a full body scan on myself in a while. It's harder to work on myself than it is to work on you. 

You are easy.

I can find your shit easy. Clearing your shit is easy.

Healers need healers.

I've got shit to clear out around that. I'm still feeling very much like I need to DIY my healing. 

Feeling the need to DIY instead of paying someone else to do it is a trauma response.

SHIT!!!

It feels expensive. CRAP! That's scarcity. 

I guess I need to go find someone to book a session with.

Do you need a healing session?

Here's my link to schedule one.

https://calendly.com/jessicalloyd/energy-healing-session-and-payment

My week from hell

I woke up Wednesday morning in so much pain. 

Pain everywhere.

It was in my stomach, my bowels, my back, everything felt weak, I couldn't breathe deep, and I started puking.

I was supposed to take my daughter to her GI specialist but there was no way that was happening.

Thankfully my son still lives at home and he was able to take her. Both of them asked me if I needed to go to the ER.

I called my husband and told him I was dying.

He left work saw me and scooped me up and took me to the emergency room.

They admitted me to the hospital with pancreatitis and high triglycerides.

This is the second time I've had pancreatitis. The first time was in August of 2009. It was triggered by a reaction to a drug I had been prescribed for Crohn's disease. I was told .05% could get pancreatitis from this drug. Those odds looked good to me. Nope! I was in that super small percentage.

My triglycerides were 7340. They are supposed to be less than 150. Holy shit!!! 

They they put me in the heart unit because my heart was not doing well. I don't exactly know what was going on with it, but they moved me from a regular room to one in the telemetry unit.

They said my blood looked like sludge. That's gross.

I spent several days hooked up to insulin drip IV. This lowered my triglycerides.

The tested my blood sugar every hour. EVERY DAMN HOUR!!!!

I did a lot of self Reiki.

I watched animal planet when I felt good enough to be awake but not enough to pay attention to a real plot line. The animals were soothing.

I was diagnosed with diabetes.

Shit! I love carbs!

I learned how to test my blood sugar and how to give myself the insulin injections. 

Which by the way are so much easier to do than methotrexate injections.

I had a panic attack the night I got home from the hospital. I just felt so much fear.

I used my tools to make the anxiety go away. I journaled until I had felt the fear and could leave it behind. The fucker keeps visiting me. I say "hello" and send him packing.

Today is Wednesday, again.

I am learning how to manage this new life.

I am grateful for the hospital but I am so grateful that I am home.

My husband has been amazing through the whole experience. He stayed with me as much as he could and when he couldn't be there he had my mom come sit with me. 

He's helping me to learn how to eat using the dietary information that they sent us home with. He loves to cook so this is good for us.

Isn't my first big diagnosis. It isn't the first change I'll have to make to my lifestyle. I will manage it.